WHAT I LOVE ABOUT MY HUSBAND

Our love story is perfect.

We first met in summer 2015 in Stuttgart. Tobias was waiting at the park next to my German language school. While, I was eyeing the classroom clock, impatiently waiting for the class to end. The first time I met him, I saw a tall handsome man with greenish eyes in a light green T-shirt. My eyes got real big and I felt butterflies in my stomach. We grabbed lunch, kebabs 🥙, and we sat under a tree and talked for hours, then he went back home to another city 1 hour away from Stuttgart.

We met 4x for lunch, but our relationship didn’t develop further, I told him “this ‘us’ won’t happen, because I’ll go back to Jakarta next week”.

The following year, in summer 2016, I went back to Germany. In Oktober, I remembered him and wanted to see him again before going back for good to Jakarta as I had planned. He invited me to Wasen Oktoberfest. He picked me up at the train station, looking beautiful in his jacket. That night we kissed.

Things went so fast. 2 months later he proposed, and I said yes.

::: WHAT I LOVE ABOUT TOBIAS

What I love about Tobias,
he makes me feel comfortable about even embarrassing things.
Living with DIPG, my appearance changes due to the tumor and the treatment. I walk limping, I talk mumbling with nasal voice, I rapidly gain weight, i have crossed eyes, and I laugh uncontrollably. But he shows affection every time and everywhere, even in public.

He really likes to listen to podcasts, sometimes he listens too much for too long. He sleeps with earplugs listening to podcasts.

He is incredibly organized with files, hard copy and soft copy. I rely on him to keep things in order.
Sortieren (sorting) may be one of his favorite pastimes.

He’s extremely on time, often arrives 5-10 minutes early. He hates being late. For him punctuality is a serious business.

He’s very self sufficient. He can cook himself dinner, clean the house, do the laundry and iron his shirts. It’s not easy for him to make up our bed, but he tries for me.

He is incredibly athletic.
He does sports almost everyday.
Cycling for 100 km, or swimming for 2 km, or running for 8 km.

Every early morning, he’s always brewing a pot of tea for our morning tea routine.

He’s very honest with himself and everyone.

Scientific facts and science communication are his favorite things, and he dislikes views that disregard science.

Tobias is confident but not arrogant.
Sometimes he receives negative feedback on his blog but he remains undaunted.

He makes me proud. He never tries to conform, he’s always himself. He’s a leader, and a great teacher.

He’s energy conscious, unlike me, who often forgets to turn off the light.

He’s very competitive when playing board games like Carcassonne.

He loves being outside in nature. Big crowds make him nervous.

Tobias eats like he’s trying to get over with, as if he’s inhaling the food.

He is a neat eater. He eats burgers with fork and knife. He doesn’t like buffalo chicken wings, unlike me, who don’t mind eating sloppy food and getting my hands messy.

He never went to American fast food chains (Subway, KFC, Pizza Hut, Dunkin’ Donuts, and Starbucks) until he met me.

He memorizes song lyrics after listening to the song a couple of times, his secret talent.

In the evening, he loves watching Netflix with me. He gets scared easily in movies and squeezes my hands, or my legs.

He is always in tune with my family although they’re culturally different. My family loves him.

I never met his parents, they already passed away. He told me that his parents never fought in front of their children, so he’s not good at arguing. Everyday, we burst out laughing and we never argue.

He’s very close to his brothers. They are always in touch.

He is handsome.
He is tender, kind, loving, thoughtful, happy and a genuine man.
So easy to love.

He loves being my husband.
He quietly endures all the things you are supposed to hate, like me placing my freezing cold feet and hands on his hot body before sleep.

He’s brave.
He takes all of my feelings steadily.
He knows when to cry with me, and when to not give in to them but to just hug me.

He cleans my PEG every day.
He edits my writings.

He is funny.
He gets my jokes, which is hard for Germans.

He makes things easy for me.
He knows what I’m dealing with.
He helps me take my boots off.

He always kisses me whenever he’s with me.
And he can’t keep his hands off me.
I’m like a magnet for him.

I didn’t get the chance to give him a child.
He would be an awesome dad.
He’s great with little kids.

Our priorities are each other.
He has a reduced work schedule and takes Fridays off to spend longer weekends with me.
He always takes me with him on his business trips.

I know he loves me from the way he looks at me.

He always reminds me that who I am is perfectly good enough. My soul is blooming by simply being with him.

I’m his honig 🍯
He’s loving me more than I can put into words.
I wish we could grow old together.
We love each other with our whole being.
……………………

In March 2017, I was diagnosed with late stage incurable brain cancer, DIPG. I told him maybe we should cancel our marriage, but he insisted that we speed up the process to get married.

April 2017, we got happily married in the local registry office.

Our love is not blind.
Our love is real.
Tobias is a blessing from above.
He is my anchor, my safety.
And I love him tremendously.

Love,
Titien

“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”
‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13:7‬ ‭NLT‬‬

::: UPDATE ABOUT ME
2 Years 9 Months Post Biopsy
Midline Pontine Glioblastoma/DIPG Grade IV

On Monday, February 24th, I did MRI.

I’ll meet the doctor to discuss the result on Thursday, March 5th.

Last MRI in January showed that the tumor in my brainstem was stable. Unfortunately they saw something on my cerebellum. It wasn’t clear if it’s a pseudo progression or a real tumor. So, this MRI results will give us the answer.

There’s no new symptoms, but all symptoms are getting intenser: head pressure, weaker arms, difficulty in pronouncing words, difficulty with walking, nasal voice, balance issue, fits of laughter.

Please go to “My Medical History” for more details.

Thanks for keeping me in your prayers 🙏

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